ONLY Kenyans…….1. Are engaged for 5 years or more

2. Never bother to di vorce, they just separate

3. Are late to church, work, and everything else EXCEPT when the disco is free before 9pm *****

4. Refer to diabetes as 'SUGAR'

5. Show up at weddings, showers, graduation, birthday parties with a new outfit on with nails and hair done but no gift

6. In relation to #5, they eat like parking boys and take a plate home

7. Consider 'clubbing' or 'henging' as a monthly expense

8. Leave bills (instead of insurance money) behind for surviving relatives.

9. Borrow money for a wedding.

10. Have mothers who can use curse words andreligion ALL IN ONE SENTENCE e.g. "Lord, give me strength because I'm about to knock the hell out of this child"

11. Spend the car insurance money on everything EXCEPT getting the dent fixed.

12. Invite co-workers and all of their friends to their child's 1st birthday party which happens to have a professional DJ with only about 3 kid (including the child) in attendance. And then expect the guests to "changa" for the bash.

13. Start every sentence with "Me I…"e.g. "ME I donno why you are saying that I always say 'Me I'.

14. Say 'Spend' when they are staying the night elsewhere from home, e.g. "Are you going to spend at her place?"

 15. Put in iron rods in all windows and main doors…referring to them as ''Burglar''

16. Use "Ngai" as an exclamation mark e.g. "Ngai, what are you doing?"

17. Believe "Ati" is an English word for "What?"

18. Think it is cool to drink and drive and get away with it "I don't know how I got home that day..the way I was soo drunk!"

19. Think all their economic and social problems are caused by "Moi" when in fact some have never been to school.

 20. Pack up all their earthly goods to go to "shaggs" for a week in December, only to pack them all back  again after that one week and return to "Tao"

21. Call travelling "flying out" e.g. She flew out (no one ever seems to wonder where all these Kenyans fly to)

22. Think that taking a clerical job in a company is better and "cooler" than toiling in their parents' family business.

23. Prefer washing cars and dishes in USA to toiling in their 20-acre tea farms in
Kenya.

24. Call their homes "at ours". e.g., "At ours, weeat Githeri every day"

25. Complain for five years about poor governance and corruption then vote in the same clowns back to parliament.

26. Have a chief Justice who has no law degree!

27. Go on strike for one day and expect the govt to resign!

28. Sit back in their homes and expect their MP to"bring Development"

29. Refuse to insure against anything and expect you to bankroll them when calamity strikes… thro' Harambee.

30. Sit calmly and sometimes cheer as a mad man drives them in a ramshackle at breakneck speed to certain death.

31. Drive with their windows wound up when they get to city centre because of 4-year-old brats armed with human feaces, and still claim to be free people!

Me, I am Keny an DAMU!!!!

I'm giving out 1 invite to this site

 All you have to do is write a poem about the Moon, or the Sun.

 Winner gets the invite.

If you don't win I post your poetry here.

 Good luck.

Yeiy! I think my gf is gonna luuuvvvv this!!

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you’re told that you’re loved. You’d like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful… that you’ll never change. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future… one you can grow with. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something precious. You’ll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred. In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You’ll do anything for love, but you won’t fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

You Are Likely an Only Child

At your darkest moments, you feel frustrated. At work and school, you do best when you’re organizing. When you love someone, you tend to worry about them. In friendship, you are emotional and sympathetic. Your ideal careers are: radio announcer, finance, teaching, ministry, and management. You will leave your mark on the world with organizational leadership, maybe as the author of self-help books.

The Birth Order Predictor

Your Luck Quotient: 72%

You have a high luck quotient. More often than not, you’ve felt very lucky in your life. You may be randomly lucky, but it’s probably more than that. Optimistic and open minded, you take advantage of all the luck that comes your way.

How Lucky Are You?

You Are a Hunter Soul

You are driven and ambitious – totally self motiviated to succeed Actively working to acheive what you want, you are skillful in many areas. You are a natural predator with strong instincts … and more than a little demanding. You are creative, energetic, and an extremely powerful force. An outdoors person, you like animals and relate to them better than people. You tend to have an explosive personality, but also a good sense of humor. People sometimes see you as arrogant or a know it all. You tend to be a bit of a loner, though you hate to be alone. Souls you are most compatible with: Seeker Soul and Peacemaker Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?

I’ve invited all I can. but everytime I hit gmail i find the legend.

 Fifty more invites

 Invading inbox like termites.

 If you want an account for you and three generations in your family drop me a note.

Ther’es a place called writers block in a community called Spymac where you write what you feel. I always hit the Reply button without having a suitable reply. So I have to write a poem on the fly… Like this one

Why I write. 

I feel like I have to write a poem
like a tree needs xylem and phloem
Sometimes I want to
More times I have to

I can’t let the Idea flow away

On dawny mornings the sun is grey
Trying to awaken a new born day
The cold is locked outside the panes
And I cuddle ‘tween my blankety manes

Awake! I can’t let this thought go away

Of hills and dales and shady glens
My mind is like a moving lens
That sees above below beside
As heaven opens gates so wide

Another musing I can’t betray

Sometimes I feel I am not free
To or not make my writings be
Because in the end my rejected plea
Means that my prose and verse are me.

So you see?